Numb
by LazySmurf247
Summary: AU: It's 2011, Nicole gets released from prison and goes back home with her family. As she tries to get her life back together, everything starts to get extremely complicated. Kozik/OC! Rated T for language. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: What's going on, everyone? Here is yet another story from yours truly. I thought about this one in the wee hours in the morning and started writing it, when I was on my way up north to hike in Sedona, and let me tell you... Sedona is friggin' beautiful. Anyhoo... it's set two years after season 2, which is in the year 2011. Abel and Gemma is home, Cameron Hayes was taken care of, and Half Sack isn't going to be in this one, there will be a few new prospects. Plus I'll be having another story in the works, which would probably be a good one too, but we'll see. Well, I hope you all enjoy this and as always R&R! Thanks!

P.S. I own NOTHING from Sons of Anarchy... just my girls and any other OC's in here. I just **LOVE** the hell out of this awesome show!

* * *

...Chapter 1...

"It feels so good to finally be free!" Nicole yelled to the sky, after she walked through the triple thick gates, then she kneeled down to the ground, and kissed the pavement a few times. "God, I missed you so." she whispered, then stood up to the person standing in front of her, with a weird look on his face. "So, Detective Jones, do you have any words of wisdom, before I leave, and go back home where I belong?"

"Yeah." he nodded. "I don't want to see you come back here. I pulled a lot of strings and asked for a few favors, to get you out of this shitty rat hole."

"Well, thanks." she smiled.

Detective Jones frowned. "Nicole, you've spent about five or so years in this prison... you should take this more seriously." he shook his head. "Don't fuck it up."

Nicole stood there, thinking about what got her into this bullshit mess in the first place, then she gave Detective Jones a hug. "Thank you." she whispered in his ear. "I'm very grateful for everything you have done for me and helping me get my life back." she backed up to look at him, then gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks."

He smiled as they broke from the hug. "You're welcome. Hopefully I won't see you around... meaning in here."

"Okay." she nodded. "I'll be good." he nodded, then walked away.

After she watched Detective Jones walk back through the gates of the prison, she turned around, and ran into a pair of arms, who was holding them out, and held on as tight as she could. "Oh, my fucking God!" she yelled. "I've never been so happy to see my big brother." she paused as she had tears falling down her cheeks. "I missed you, Tig."

"Missed you too, Kid."

"What about me?" she heard behind her. "Don't I get a hug?"

She quickly turned around and saw one of her best friends with a smile. "Jax!" she yelled, then let go of Tig, and gave him a hug. "Damn... it's good to see you."

"Yeah." he nodded. "It's been a long five years." he let her go and wiped the tears from her face. "And everyone's missed you."

Nicole looked around. "Is it just you two here?" both of them nodded. "Where is everyone?"

"At the clubhouse." Tig smiled. "Waiting for you to come home."

"And Riley?"

"She's fine." Jax nodded. "My mom has her."

"Wow, I bet she's big by now... and she's five? I've missed everything." she shook her head, thinking about her little girl. A few weeks before she got sent to the Valley State Prison for Women, she had just given birth to Riley and she's only been with her those two weeks of her life. She got sent in there Febuary of 2006 for breaking and entering, assault, and grand theft auto, and was sentenced seven years, but thanks to Detective Jones, he got it reduced to five. While she was locked up, she had Gemma, her best friends Crystal, Katie, Cassie, and the club take care of Riley, since she couldn't do it, and nobody knows who the father is, because Nicole's never said anything, and she refused to tell them, because Nicole knows that it would just become a problem for the club, and she didn't want that.

Jax and Tig, had serious looks on their faces, then Jax took a deep breath. "That's not all you've missed."

"What do you mean?"

"How 'bout we talk about it later?" Tig suggested. "And for tonight, just visit with the family, we'll fill you in tomorrow."

"Sure." she nodded. "Then take me home... I wanna see my little girl." they started walking to their bikes, then Nicole stopped in her tracks. "Wait..."

"What?" Jax asked, turning around.

"She doesn't even know me or know the sound of my voice." she paused. "Does Riley even know what I look like?"

"Of course." Tig nodded. "Since she could understand, all of us would either show her pictures or tell her stories about you."

"Oh." she paused. "I'm a little nervous seeing her."

"She knows that you're coming." Jax started. "And she might be nervous too, so don't be surprised if she's a little distant from you."

"Okay." she nodded. "So who's supposed to be at the clubhouse? You said _everyone_ is there."

Tig growled, then Jax said "That shit between you, Kozik, and Happy... has been squashed, don't worry." he shrugged, getting on his bike. "It was squashed right after you got sent here."

"Okay, good... I'm not gonna come in between them again, I just need to focus getting my life back on track and take care of Riley." she nodded. "Okay, let's go!" she looked over at Tig, who had a frown on his face. "What?"

"I told Kozik to stay the hell away from you."

"Jesus! You two are still fighting?" Tig didn't say nothing, he just glared at her. "Children." she shook her head, then got on the back of Jax's bike. "Okay, take me home."

"You got it." Jax said, starting his bike, then looked over at Tig. "Let's go."

Tig mumbled something under his breath as he got on his bike, then after he started it, they took off over to the clubhouse.

* * *

A/N: This chapter was a little short, but no worries, it'll get better! I just hope you guys like it!

Plus: Uhh... Check this out: I've never see an episode of The Shield in my life and the one time I decide to actually watch it, is the same exact one that Kenny Johnson aka Lem aka KOZIK... dies in. WTF! That wasn't even cool and I've been bummed out for the rest of the night. Out of all the episodes to show the very night I'm actually watching it, why in the fuck did it have to be that one? UGH! Okay... enough of my venting. LOL. Well, enjoy this and as always, show some love and don't forget to R&R! Thanks!


	2. Chapter 2

...Chapter 2...

Jax and Tig pulled up into the parking lot of Teller - Morrow and parked with the rest of the bikes that were lined up in the lot. Nicole didn't move, she sat there behind Jax frozen. "What are you doing?" Jax asked her.

"I told you... I'm a little nervous."

"You'll be fine." he laughed. "Don't worry."

Tig walked up to her and held out his hand. "Come on, Sis." she grabbed it and got off the bike. "Everyone's waiting for you."

"Okay." she took a few deep breaths, more like ten breaths, then started walking. "I think I'm ready."

Jax laughed, then put his arm around her. "I missed my best friend." then Nicole came to a sudden stop at the door. "What are you doing?"

"You walk in first."

"Just bring your ass, girl." Tig said, before opening the door and walking in.

"Asshole." Nicole muttered, then walked into the clubhouse with Jax.

"Welcome home!" everyone yelled.

"Wow... thanks guys." she smiled. "It's good to finally be home." for the next ten minutes, Nicole was hugging almost everyone in there, then she noticed that there was two new prospects, Donna and Luann was missing, so was Juice, and she saw Opie hanging on another woman. _"What's up with that?" _she thought to herself, because she knows nothing that has gone on while she was away, then came face to face with both Kozik and Happy. "Hey guys." she nervously waved.

"Hey." Kozik nodded, then gave her a hug. "It's good to see you." he whispered in her ear. "I missed you so much."

She just nodded, then let go, and looked at Happy, who had a scowl on his face. "Hey, Hap." she smiled.

The scowl on his face quickly turned calm and relaxed, then he grabbed her wrist, pulling her into his arms. She wrapped her arms underneath the back of his cut, holding on tight, and lightly scratching his back. "Hey, Babe." he whispered.

"Hey, you."

"Glad you're home."

"Me too." she nodded, then both of them heard a clearing of the throat, she turned around and saw Jax, Tig, and Kozik glaring at Happy. "What?" she asked innocently. "I'm just saying hi."

"Well, maybe you should stick with your plan."

She rolled her eyes and let go of Happy, facing Tig. "Yes, Mom." she gave him a half ass salute.

"You just got home and you're already being a bitch?"

"Yes, Big Brother... it's what I do." she smirked.

Gemma walked up to Nicole and said "Honey, there's someone else that wants to see you."

"Okay." she nodded.

"Juice!" Gemma yelled. "Bring out the munchkin!"

Seconds later, Juice walked out of the hallway, carrying Riley in his arms. Nicole and Riley locked eyes as soon as they were in front of each other and the tears started rolling down Nicole's cheeks. Riley put up her hand and whispered something in Juice's ear. Then Juice nodded and said "Yes, she is."

"Can you put me down, Uncle Juice?" he nodded, then put her to her feet. She took another look at the woman in front of her and smiled. "Mommy!" she yelled, then ran into Nicole's arms.

Nicole picked her up and held on tight. "Hey, Baby Girl... I missed you so much."

Riley backed up to look at her. "I love you, Mommy."

Nicole smiled, letting the tears fall. "I love you too, Baby."

Riley wiped them away with her thumbs. "Don't cry, Mommy... this is your happy day."

"I know." she nodded.

Clay clapped. "Okay, let's get this party started!" then after Nicole put Riley back down, and she jumped on Juice's lap, the party was in full swing.

* * *

A few hours later, after Nicole put Riley in one of the rooms to take a nap, she was outside, sitting on top of the picnic table, drinking a beer, when she heard footsteps behind her, she looked over, and smiled. "Hey, Crystal."

"Hey, what are you doing out here?" she asked, sitting down next to her.

"Just taking a time out... everything is just overwelming."

"I see." Crystal nodded.

"So how are you and Jax?" Nicole raised her eyebrow. "You two are still together, right?"

"No, not really."

"Why not?"

"Eveything that happened with the club, Jax and Tara, Donna, Luann, and Abel... we just drifted apart. We're still friends though."

"Well, that's good." Nicole raised her eyebrow. "But, what happened to Luann and Donna... and who's Abel?"

"You don't know?"

"I know _nothing_." Nicole shook her head. "I didn't keep in contact with any of you guys, so I'm fucking clueless."

"Oh." Crystal nodded. "Well... Abel is Jax and Wendy's son."

"Jax had a son? That's awesome."

"Yeah, he's a cutie."

"Okay, now what happened to Luann and Donna?"

Crystal looked at the ground. "Luann got killed." Nicole's eyes widened. "By, we think, a rival pornographer guy."

"No fucking way." Crystal nodded, then Nicole rubbed her shoulder. "I'm sorry, Crys... I know she was like an aunt to you."

"Thanks."

Nicole gave her a weak smile. "Okay, now what happened to Donna and why is Ope hanging on some other chick?"

"The night Abel got released from the hospital, because he was born ten weeks premature and he had Jax's family flaw... well, that night Donna was killed by someone shooting out the back of the window while she was waiting at a stop light, thinking it was Opie."

"What! Someone was after Opie?" Crystal nodded. "Who killed Donna then?" Crystal didn't respond. "Crys.. who was it? Did they make them pay?"

"Not really."

"Who. Killed. Donna?"

"Your brother."

Nicole's eyes widened like flying saucers. "What! Tig killed her!" Crystal slightly nodded. "What the fuck!"

As Nicole was getting off the picnic table, Crystal grabbed her arm for dear life pulling her back. "Don't make a scene in there... Opie's already taken care of it."

"Good for him, but I haven't." she smirked, then walked back into the clubhouse, scanning the room for Tig.

"Hey." Kozik said, walking up to her. "You want a beer?"

"Not now."

"What's wrong?"

"I need to have a chat with my brother." seconds later, she found him sitting on the couch with Katie on his lap, and walked up to him. "Tig... we need to talk."

"Okay."

"I'm so glad you're back, Girly."

"Me too, Katie." Nicole nodded, then crossed her arms over her chest, and glared at Tig. "Outside... NOW." then she stormed out, slamming the door.

"What's up with her?" Jax asked Tig.

"Don't know." he shrugged, then him, Jax, Juice, Kozik, and Happy walked out of the clubhouse, then Tig walked up to her, as the guys stayed a few feet behind him. "What?" Nicole didn't say anything, she just smirked, shaking her head. Seconds later, Nicole punched him in the face as hard as she could, knocking him to the ground. The guys' and Crystal's jaw dropped. "What the fuck, Nicole... Jesus!"

"I don't give a fuck about the reason as to why you were supposed to kill Ope... but instead, you kill Donna? I know you're a little nuts, but Alex, have you lost your fucking mind?"

"Who told you that?" asked Jax.

"Oh, my God." Crystal said, walking up. "I'm sorry, I told her." she looked down at Tig. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." he waved his arm. "I was gonna tell her tomorrow and I'm sure, I would of got a punch to the face even then."

"You damn right you would have."

Tig finally got to his feet, then heavily sighed. "Look, I said I'm sorry... and to this day, I still feel like total shit, all right?"

Nicole just shook her head, then looked at Jax. "You have a son?"

"Yeah... but he's at home with Cassie."

"Oh, that's who else wasn't here."

"Yeah." Crystal nodded. "Abel wasn't feeling good, so she offered to watch him, so she could do her work, and study."

"Study?"

"She goes to Stockton Community College."

"Oh." Nicole nodded. "That's cool... damn, you guys need to catch me up with everything." she laughed. "I'm out of the loop."

"Don't worry." Juice smiled. "We'll tell you everything."

"Good, because I feel lost and out of place." she nodded, then looked right at Kozik and Happy. "I need to talk to both of you... alone." both of them exchanged glances, then Nicole walked back over to the picnic table, and sat on top of it.

As both of them walked over to her, that was Jax, Tig, Crystal, and Juice's cue to go back into the clubhouse. Kozik took a deep breath as he stood in front of her, with Happy beside him with his arms crossed over his chest, waiting for what Nicole had to say.


	3. Chapter 3

...Chapter 3...

"Whoa!" Clay yelled, looking at Tig's face.

"What the hell happened to you?" Bobby asked, with a little laugh.

Tig grabbed a beer from the freezer and put it to his cheek. "Nicole found out about Donna."

"By who?"

"Crys told her... and it's fine, I was gonna tell Nicole tomorrow." he shrugged. "Either if she knew now or then, I'm sure I'd get the same results."

Clay and Bobby laughed, then Clay said "You got that right."

Tig groaned. "I'm gonna lay down." he waved then he went into his room.

A few minutes later, Riley walked out into the main part of the clubhouse, and looked around. "Uncle Kozzy, where are you?"

Opie walked up to her and said "He's outside with your mommy."

Riley grabbed his hand. "Will you come with me?"

"Sure." he nodded, then both of them walked outside.

Riley saw her Uncle Kozik and Uncle Happy talking to her Mommy by the picnic table, and ran up to Kozik, hugging his leg. "Uncle Kozzy!"

He kneeled down to her level and said "What's up, Munchkin?"

She pointed her little finger in his face. "You were supposed to take me to get a new Hot Wheels."

He laughed. "I know, I know... but guess what?"

"What?"

"Close your eyes." she did what she was told, then Kozik reached into his pocket, and pulled out a brand new Hot Wheels car, holding it in front of her face. "Okay, you can open your eyes."

She opened them and she lit up like the 4th of July. She grabbed it from his hand and opened it from the package. "Thank you, Uncle Kozzy, I don't think I have this one."

"You don't." he shook his head. "It's a 1969 Dodge Charger."

"I love it." she gave him a hug. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." he backed up to look at her. "How 'bout you go show everyone inside while I talk with Mommy, okay?"

She nodded, then looked at Nicole. "Look what Uncle Kozzy gave me."

"Yeah, it's cool." she smiled at her and she couldn't help but to smile at them, that was the cutest thing she's ever seen in a long time. "I'll be inside in a little bit."

"Okay, Mommy." Riley nodded, then looked up at Opie. "Will you play cars with me?"

"Of course." he grabbed her hand and walked inside with her.

After Nicole watched her baby girl and Opie go into the clubhouse, she turned her attention to the guys, and noticed the annoyed look on Happy's face. "Well." she started. "We gotta talk... and I've been playing this in my head, what I was gonna say to both of you when I got out."

"About what?" Kozik asked.

Nicole took a swig of her beer, then deeply sighed. "Okay, what happened between the three of us, can't happen again... I mean, you two are best friends and I almost tore you apart." she shook her head. "I can't do that to you again and I won't." Happy nodded, as Kozik just looked at the ground. "I care about the both of you, and you will always be in my life, but I can't be the one to come in between you, it's just not fair." she looked at the ground. "I just want to get my life back on track and make up for lost time with my daughter, those are the main two things I want to focus on doing."

"All right." Happy nodded, but didn't look at her. "If that's what you want." then he walked back into the clubhouse.

_"Fucking great, I pissed him off."_ she thought to herself, then looked at Kozik, who had a sad look on his face. "What?" she asked.

"Nothing, I just.." he paused, trying to think of something to say. "Never mind, I guess, it's not important anymore." he shook his head and walked into the clubhouse, just like Happy did.

"Wow, strike two." she mumbled to herself, then downed the rest of her beer.

* * *

It was after midnight by the time the party was dying down, most of them either went home, crashed into their rooms, or they were still drinking. Nicole walked up to Chibs, who had Riley asleep on his lap, and smiled. Chibs looked up at her and nodded. "She's a beautiful little girl, Love... and she's smart."

"Thanks."

"Where are you staying at?"

"I'm not sure... let me check." then she walked up to Jax. "Hey, where am I staying?"

"At your place."

"What?"

"All of us guys and the girls got together and fixed up a place for you and Riley."

"Seriously?"

Yeah." he nodded. "It's all ready with stuff in it... Crystal, Cassie, and Katie's been living in there for a few months with her."

"Oh, cool." she nodded. "Where is it?"

"Across the street from my house."

"Awesome." she gave him a hug. "Thank you."

"No problem." he let go of her. "Are you ready to go or something?"

"Yeah... I gotta get Riley, she's sleeping on top of Chibs."

"Okay... I'll get Happy."

He started to walk away, then she grabbed his arm. "Wait, why do you need to get him?"

"Because." he started. "A while ago, Gemma was going somewhere at night and she had Riley with her... this stupid bitch got Gemma out of the car, hit her over the head, and took off somewhere, leaving Riley alone in the back seat."

"Are you fucking serious?"

"Yeah." he nodded, "Well, Happy was on his way back to Tacoma that night when he spotted the Cadillac. As he got closer, he heard crying, then when he saw Riley sitting in the back seat, scared out of her mind, he took her out, and brought her back to the clubhouse."

"Thank God."

"Yeah, she was lucky he was there, at the right place, and at the right time."

"Um, yeah... I'm glad he was." she paused. "But what happened to Gemma?"

"I'm gonna let her tell you, when she's ready."

"Okay." she slowly nodded, wondering what it was.

"So since that night, Riley can't sleep at night unless Happy is with her." he paused. "He's like her security blanket."

"But she's sleeping fine on Chibs."

"Yeah, because she knows Happy is nearby, and he's not gonna leave her." he paused. "So that means, he'll be at your house, when she goes to sleep."

"That's wonderful, so much for my plan to stay away from him." she rolled her eyes. "But isn't Happy... and Kozik, part of the Tacoma charter?"

"They were, but got transferred to Charming, because they wanted to be closer to Riley." Nicole made an 'O' shape with her lips. "And let me tell you... Riley and Abel are the most protected kids in this town, _nobody_ would be able to come near them."

"That's good." she nodded.

"Nicole." Jax started. "I'm curious."

"About what?"

"Who's Riley's father?"

"I can't tell you." she shook her head.

"Why not?"

"Because, it's just gonna cause problems for all of you."

"Why?"

"It just will, okay?"

Jax started to think. "Is Kozik her father?" he whispered.

"No, he's not... but yes, I was kind of with him at the time, but no, he's not her father... I would have said something if he was."

"Then who is it?"

She groaned. "Jax, it's only gonna piss you off, if I tell you."

"Come on, I won't say anything."

"Yeah, you will and once I do, you'll call a meeting in the chapel, then you'll go out on a rampage."

Jax raised his eyebrow, and noticed Nicole's eyes watering, then he started to worry. "Come on, tell me, Nicky." he grabbed her hand. "I'm your best friend, we used to tell each other everything."

She nodded and took a deep breath, as she now, felt the tears falling down her cheeks, trying not to relive the specific memory. "Riley's biological father is... Kyle Hobart."

Jax's eyes widened. "What!" he yelled, getting everyone's attention in the clubhouse, including Tig, Happy, and Kozik.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I'd just like to say... I'm super excited that FX will be showing re-runs of season 2, starting TONIGHT and now my Jax, Happy, Juice, and Kozik fix will be all right and fulfilling, until I get my season 2 DVD comes in the mail, then right after that is season 3. wOoT!

* * *

...Chapter 4...

"What's going on?" Tig asked, walking up to Nicole and Jax, with Happy and Kozik behind him. "And why the hell are you crying, Nicole?"

She wiped her eyes. "Shut up, it's nothing... damn."

"Nothing!" Jax yelled. "It's not just nothing."

"You said you wouldn't say anything."

"Well, I didn't promise and this is beyond serious."

"What?" Tig asked. "What is it?"

Nicole glared at Jax. "You say a word and I'll never forgive you."

"I'm sorry, Nicky... but I have to."

"What the fuck ever, asshole." she glared at him, then she stormed out of the clubhouse.

"What the fuck is going on with my sister?" Tig demanded.

Jax ran his fingers through his hair, trying to contain his anger, but Nicole was right, he was pissed off, and he was going to call a meeting. "Just forget about it until tomorrow."

"No... I want to know why she's upset."

Jax looked at Tig and nodded. "Okay, Nicole just told me who Riley's father is."

Kozik swallowed hard, then asked "So... who is it?"

"She said it was Hobart." their eyes widened and their jaws dropped to the ground. "And the way she sounded, I think he raped her, because I know there is no way she'd ever get with him." Jax looked over at Kozik. "She also said that she was with you at the time it happened."

Tig's eyes darted towards Kozik. "And I bet you thought that my niece was yours, right?"

"At first."

"And that's when you thought she was cheating on you with me and Ry looked nothing like me either, but you ended up hurting her for no reason." Happy shook his head. "You're a fucking idiot." then Happy walked outside, looking for Nicole, and found her on the picnic table with her head down. He slowly walked up to her and when he touched her arm, she flinched. "It's just me."

"Sorry."

He sat down and put his arm around her. "You have nothing to be sorry for." she nodded, as she held on tight to his cut. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"So he did tell you?" she slightly shook her head. "Damn it."

"Don't get pissed at Jax... if he wouldn't have told me, I woulda got it out of you... one way or another." Happy paused, then lifted Nicole onto his lap, and wrapped his arms around her as she put her head in the crook of his neck. "How come you didn't say anything?"

"I don't know." she shrugged. "I thought if I told anyone, he'd come after me again, and hurt me or something."

Happy backed up to look at her and held onto her chin, gazing into her eyes. "He never would have came near you, if you were with me."

"Well, even though the guys had him ex-communicated, he still found ways to either talk to me or go where ever I was, and bug me." she put her head back in the crook of his neck. "And it finally stopped after he saw my stomach getting bigger."

"Does he know about Riley?"

"I don't know... but I think he thought Kozik was the father."

Happy shook his head. "I'm gonna fucking kill him... did you know that he tried to get back into the club by buying us back?"

"Seriously?"

"Yep, but Jax and Ope saw the Reaper on his back and Clay asked Kyle, if he wanted fire or knife."

"And he chose?"

"Fire and Tig is the one that burned it off."

"Good... that dumb son of a bitch deserved it."

"Yep, and when I see him again, I'm gonna kill him... very slowly." Happy paused. "So, Jay... don't be pissed off at Jax for telling us." Nicole looked at him with her eyes wide. "What?" he asked. "You think I forgotten the nickname I gave you?"

"Well, yeah." she nodded.

"Not a chance, Babe... everytime I saw a blue jay flying around, I thought of you." he groaned as Nicole had the biggest smile. "Fuck, that makes me sound like a pussy."

"No, it don't." she shook her head. "It's sweet."

He glared at her. "Don't you dare tell anyone."

"My lips are sealed."

A few minutes later, Jax, Juice, Tig, and Kozik walked outside and over to them. Kozik was glaring at Happy, seeing Nicole sitting on his lap and in his arms. "What's going on?" Tig asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Nothing." Nicole shrugged. "Happy and I are just talking."

"Are you still gonna talk to me?"

She looked over at Jax and nodded. "Sorry... I didn't mean to blow up at you like that, it's just been a long day, and I'm drained." she got off of Happy's lap and gave Jax a hug. "I'm sorry, okay?"

"It's fine, Nicky... just don't worry about it." she backed up and nodded. "We'll find him and get him for what he did to you."

"No, I got this." Happy raised his hand.

"No, let me get him."

Tig glared at Kozik. "Like you've ever killed anyone, you're a little bitch."

Nicole shook her head at the guys arguing back and forth. "Enough!" she yelled. "How 'bout _all of you _do whatever it is you do with him... just stop fucking fighting." they all looked at her in shock, then she turned her attention to Jax. "I wanna just go home and go to sleep."

"Okay." he nodded.

"I'll go get Ry." Happy said, before walking back into the clubhouse, and Nicole noticed Kozik rolling his eyes.

"I'll get Crystal and we'll follow you."

Okay, but Jax? Who am I riding with?"

"Kozik will take you."

"Hell no!" Tig yelled. "If she's going with anyone, she'll go with me."

"In any other situation, she would." Jax shrugged. "But Clay needs you here."

Tig got in Kozik's face. "You better keep your hands off my sister." Kozik just chuckled and winked at Nicole, and walked away to his bike, then Tig looked at Jax. "I'm gonna kill him."

Nicole gave Tig a hug. "No, you won't Tig.. you're full of shit."

"I'll do it."

"Just leave him alone, damn." Nicole kissed him on the cheek. "I love you."

"Love you too, Sis."

She gave Juice and Jax a hug, then walked over to Kozik and his bike. "Hey you." he smiled. "You're riding with me."

"Yeah, I know." she nodded.

Kozik waited until Tig went back into clubhouse, then he reached out and grabbed her hand pulling her closer to him. "I'm sorry, all of that happened to you, if I had known..."

Nicole put her finger to his lips. "Don't blame yourself... I don't want any of you to blame yourselves. This wasn't any of you... it was Kyle, so stop blaming yourself, Koz." she shrugged. "I think I would have happened regardless, no matter if I was with you or Happy."

"But still... he's dead."

"I know." she climbed on the back of his bike. "But I don't want Riley to know anything about him."

"It would be best if she didn't." he nodded, then turned his head around to look at her, and grazed his fingers on her cheek. "You're so beautiful."

"Thank you." she nodded.

Seconds later, Happy came out with Riley in his arms, and carefully got on his bike, glaring at Kozik. "Jax gave me the keys, he's staying for a while."

"Okay." she told him, then Koz turned around. "Is Riley gonna be okay on the bike with you?"

"She'll be fine." Happy nodded, fixing her so she was sitting right. "We do this all the time."

"Oh... good to know."

He chuckled as he started his bike, then took off. Kozik shook his head and started his bike a few seconds after. "Hold on tight." he told her before taking off, behind Happy and Riley.


	5. Chapter 5

...Chapter 5...

Happy and Kozik pulled up to Nicole's new place and parked their bikes in the drive way. Happy carefully got off of his, while he still had Riley in his arms, and went into the house. Nicole just sat there, holding onto Kozik, and a part of her didn't want to let go, but she knew she had to. "Nicole?" Kozik asked, turning his head. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

He rested his hand on hers that was around his chest, hanging on his cut. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

Kozik got off his bike and stood in front of her. "It don't seem like nothing."

"I'm just glad to be home and out of that godforsaken place."

"Are you sure that's all... that's bothering you?" Kozik asked, full of concern. She didn't respond, she just sat there, thinking how stupid she was for lying to the guys about Riley's real father, because she was already pregnant when Kyle attacked her, and she knew if she said something, it would just cause a _huge_ fight. "Come on, you can tell me."

Nicole just shook her head. "I just wanna go to sleep in a real bed... I'm tired."

"Okay." he held out his hand. Nicole grabbed it and got off the bike. Seconds later, he just pulled her into his arms, and hugged her. "I missed you, so much."

She breathed in the smell of leather and cologne. "I missed you too."

"You know... I've noticed some things about Riley."

"Um.. like what?"

"Well, I know she doesn't look like me, but she does things similar to what I used to do when I was a kid." Nicole's eyes widened. "If she was my daughter, would you tell me?"

"Uh, yeah." she nodded. "Of course."

He backed up to look at her. "Is she?"

Nicole swallowed the lump in her throat and took a deep breath. "No, Koz... she's not your daughter."

He studied her face for a few more seconds, then nodded. "Okay, let's get you in the house." he grabbed her hand, and both of them walked inside.

Happy was sitting on the couch with his arms crossed over his chest, with a pissed off look on his face. "What took so long?"

"We were just talking." Nicole said, looking around. "Is Riley in her bed?" Happy nodded. "Thanks." she couldn't help to notice the way that Happy was glaring at her. "So, which room is mine."

Kozik grabbed her hand. "Follow me." she nodded, but heard Happy growl as both of them walked down the hallway. Kozik opened the door and walked in. "This is your room... you get the master bed, of course."

"Wow, that's a big bed... what is it?"

"California king, Baby." he sat down on it. "If I need somewhere to crash, your bed is big enough."

"Yeah, Happy is gonna love that." she shook her head, looking down. "My brother too."

Kozik stood up in front of Nicole and lifted her chin up with his two fingers. "I don't care, but I ain't worried about Big Bad Tiggy, he can kiss my ass." Nicole giggled a little. "As for Happy." he shrugged. "I don't know, it's something him and I have to work out." he rubbed his thumb on her cheek. "I'm glad you're home, you don't know how much I've missed you."

She moved away from him and sat down on the bed. "Yeah, I've miss you too." she looked away. "And everyone else."

Kozik turned his head, raising his eyebrow. "Are you okay? Is something wrong?"

"I just want to sleep."

"Are you sure that's all... that's bothering you? You say it's nothing or you're fine, but I know better."

"Koz... I'm just tired and I had a long day."

"Do you want me to stay?" she snapped her head up and glared at him. "Hey, Happy gets to stay... why can't I?"

"Because he might end up killing you."

He laughed. "Then that's a risk, I'm willing to take."

"Not tonight." she shook her head, making him frown. "Can't you just sleep on the couch or something?" he groaned, then she got up and grabbed his hand. "Just as long as I know you or Happy are here... I'll be fine."

Kozik studied her face a few more seconds, then sighed. "Fine." he nodded, walking away from her. "I guess I'll see you in the morning." he told her before walking out and shutting the door.

Nicole just shook her head and sighed, laying down on the bed. Her feelings for Kozik were bubbling to the surface and she couldn't help it, but she didn't want to act on them, and have a repeat of what happened last time, between her, him, and Happy. She told them earlier that nothing can happen again, but she knew neither of them would listen to what she wanted. But the truth of the matter was, Kozik would always be in her life, no matter who she was with, because he's Riley's father, and she's been debating if she should ever tell him or not. Nicole just closed her eyes and let sleep take her.

* * *

Happy and Kozik were sitting in the livingroom in silence, for over two hours. Koikz got tired of it, then said "What, Man?"

Happy glared at him. "What do you think you're doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know damn well what I mean." Happy shook his head. "Don't play stupid with me."

Kozik shrugged. "What do you want me to say?"

"That you'll leave Nicole alone."

"I can't do that."

"And why not? You're just gonna hurt again, then she'll come running to me."

Kozik shook his head. "No, I'm not going to hurt her this time."

"And why is this time any different?"

"Because... it just is." he laid down on the couch and closed his eyes. "You'll see."

Happy just groaned as he stood up to his feet. "You hurt Nicole, at all... this time, I _will kill you_ Kozik and you know I'll do it."

Kozik looked up at him. "I won't, Man... I can't lose her."

"Good." Happy nodded, but kind of upset with himself that he basically gave Kozik permission to be with Nicole, then went into Riley's room and went to sleep on his recliner, that was in the other side of her room, so she felt safe.

* * *

A/N: People the reason I put that Kozik is the daddy after all, I have a plan for this, and besides... there's hardly ANY stories with Kozik, so there you go, plus he's effin HOT! But yes, I have an awesome plan!


	6. Chapter 6

...Chapter 6...

The next morning, Nicole woke up screaming, then suddenly the door busted open, and she felt someone wrap their arms around her, but she tried to fight it. "No! Leave me alone!" she screamed. "Please! No!"

"Nicole! It's me, you're okay." she kind of heard, then started to calm down. "It's just a bad dream, Babe... I'm here and you're fine."

She slowly opened her eyes and saw that Kozik was staring at her full of worry and concern. "I'm sorry." she sobbed, holding onto him as tight as she could.

"It's okay." he said, rubbing her back.

"Please, don't leave me." she whispered.

"I won't, Baby... I don't plan on it."

"Please don't let him find me."

Kozik raised his eyebrow. "Who? Don't let who find you?" Nicole didn't answer, she started shaking as she was sobbing into his chest.

Moments later, Happy ran in the room, and saw Nicole crying her eyes out. "What the fuck happened?"

Kozik looked up. "She had a bad dream."

"But she's okay?"

Kozik slightly shook his head, but said "Yes."

Happy nodded, getting the hint that there was something else wrong, and that Kozik didn't want to say in front of Nicole. Plus he felt that something had to be wrong, because he's never seen her this upset before. "I'll be out in the livingroom."

"Okay, Brother." Kozik told him, then Happy walked out, shutting the door behind him. Kozik took a deep breath and turned his attention to Nicole, rubbing her back. "You're safe, I promise."

About ten minutes later, Nicole calmed down, and took a deep breath. "Sorry 'bout that."

Kozik wiped her tears away and shook his head. "You have nothing to be sorry for... do you want to tell me what happened?"

She slowly nodded and took another deep breath. "While I was locked up, there was this new prison guard who wouldn't leave me alone, for three months, he tried messing with me." she paused. "And he almost got to me, but he wasn't able to, because a supervisor caught him. So before he got fired, he told me that he knew everything about me and that when I got out, he was coming after me."

"What's his name?" Nicole didn't respond, she just looked at him with a blank stare, then Kozik sighed. "You need to tell me his name, so I know who to protect you from."

"After everything I've done, you still want to even be near me?"

Kozik raised his eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

Nicole looked away and shook her head. "Never mind... it's nothing."

"It's not _nothing_." he shook his head. "You mean something specific, now what is it?"

She looked up and glared at him, then as she was about to open her mouth, her door opened, and Riley ran inside, jumping on the bed. _"Saved by the bell."_ Nicole thought, then smiled at Riley. "Good morning."

"Good morning, Mommy." she paused. "Good morning, Uncle Kozzy."

"Mornin' Baby Girl." he smiled at her. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Yep." she nodded, then looked up at Nicole. "I heard you scream, Mommy... did you have a bad dream?"

"Yeah, I did... but I'm okay."

"Uncle Kozzy saved you, like Uncle Happy saves me, from my bad dreams?"

"Yes, he did, Uncle... Kozik saved me."

"Good." she smiled. "I'm hungry."

"Ry... why don't you ask Uncle Happy what's for breakfast, Mommy and I will be out in a few minutes."

"Okay." she gave Kozik a hug. "I wish you were my daddy." she whispered in his ear.

Kozik held onto her a little tighter. "I know, Baby." then seconds later, he let her go and she ran out of the room.

"What'd she tell you?" asked Nicole.

"Nothing... it's not important." he shook his head.

She rolled her eyes, then got up from her bed. As she was walking to her bathroom, Kozik grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his arms. "I need to take a shower. What are you..."

"Shh... just hug me." she nodded, then wrapped her arms around him. "I miss you being in my arms... don't you?"

"A little."

He backed up to look at her. "Just a little?" he chuckled. "You've been in prison for five years and you miss being in my arms.. a little?"

_"No, I've missed the hell out of you, Kozik, what do you think?" _she thought, then looked at the ground. "Okay, yeah, I've missed it, but..."

"But what?"

She looked back up at him. "I don't know, just give me time to adjust to everything going on."

He nodded. "Fair enough." he let go of her. "Now... tell me who that guy is that was messing with you and what were you talking about after that?"

"Nope." she groaned. "I'm not telling you."

"And why not?"

"Because." she started walking to her bathroom. "Just leave it alone... all of it!" then she slammed the door.

Happy noticed the weird look on Kozik's face as he walked out into the livingroom. "What's up with you?"

"Nothing." Kozik sat on the couch. "It's nothing."

Happy scoffed. "That's bullshit and you know it."

"Uncle Happy!" Riley kind of yelled. "Now you gotta put ten dollars in the cussing bucket."

He groaned as he dug into his pocket. "Here... munchkin." he gave her a hundred dollar bill. "This should be good for ten more times in advance."

"Thank you." she giggled, running down the hallway into her room.

Happy turned his attention to Kozik. "The little one is gone and it sounds like Nicole is in the shower... now what the hell is going on?" then Kozik took a deep breath and sat there for the next half hour, telling Happy everything that him and Nicole was talking about.

* * *

Nicole didn't want to get out of her shower, she was just sitting there in the corner, letting the hot water hit her legs, and all she could do was cry. She just couldn't stop lying and being in prison, it became natural to her, but she hated that she was hurting Kozik.

She lied about him being Riley's father, she lied about what really happened while she was locked up, and she was going to lie about telling him who the guy was. But no matter what she was going to do, she still felt trapped, and she felt as if there was no getting out of it, because _he_ was coming after her.

Nicole reached over the tub and grabbed the bottle of Jack and started chugging it down. After she drank half of it, she grabbed a razorblade and stared at it for a few minutes, sobbing, before pressing down on her wrist, ripping open the skin, watching the blood dripping in the tub.

* * *

"Shit." Kozik stood up. "She's been in there for over an hour."

"Then go check on her." Happy suggested, taking a sip of his beer.

"I will... Uncle Kozzy and ten dollars from you too." Riley smiled, then ran into Nicole's room first, the checked the bathroom. "Mommy?" she opened the curtain and all she saw was blood and Nicole's eyes rolled into the back of her head. "Aaahhh! Mommy!" she screamed.

Kozik and Happy ran in the room, then Happy said "What's wrong?"

"Mommy's bleeding." she cried, then hugged Happy's leg.

Kozik went inside the bathroom. "Shit." he muttered, picking up the razorblade. "Call an ambulance!" he screamed, then pulled her out of the bathtub, putting pressure on her wrist, while Happy called the paramedics.

* * *

A/N: I hope nobody takes offence to what I just wrote at the end. My apologies guys! It's just a story!


	7. Chapter 7

...Chapter 7...

"What the fuck happened!" Tig yelled, running into the waiting room, then his eyes darted to Kozik. "What the fuck did _you_ do to _her_?"

Kozik stood from his seat, with his arms up in defeat, while the rest of the Sons and Gemma ran in. "I didn't do anything, she went in to take a shower, and when Ry went to go check on her, she found Nicole in the tub, bleeding."

"Oh, my God." Gemma gasped, then all of them noticed Riley clinging on Happy, staring off into space. "Is she okay, Hap?"

He slightly shook his head. "Not sure, she's in shock... Tara's gonna take a look at her in a little bit."

"Do you want me to take her?"

"Um." Happy started. "She hasn't let me go since it happened and I don't think she'll let anyone else hold her."

"Oh... okay." Gemma nodded, then looked at Kozik. "When are we able to see Nicole?"

"Tara said after she stitches up her wrist, then she'll come in, and let us know."

"Her wrist!" Jax yelled. "What the hell happened to her wrist!"

"She." Kozik started, shaking his head. "She... slit it, with a razorblade."

"Why?"

"I don't know, Tig, I'd like to know that myself." Kozik sighed, sitting back down. "She was okay one minute, then the next, she's passed out in her tub." he slightly shook his head. "She's hiding something and I don't think it's good."

"What do you mean, she's hiding something?" asked Clay.

Kozik shrugged. "She wouldn't tell me."

"Well, what exactly did she say to you?" Tig asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Kozik took a deep breath, then for the next twenty minutes, he told them everything that happened, before Nicole went into the shower.

* * *

"Are you gonna explain to me... why you did this to yourself?" Tara asked, wrapping Nicole's wrist in a bandage.

Nicole scoffed. "You wouldn't understand."

"I bet I would... when Abel was taken, I wanted to do something else to take my mind off of it, to get rid of the pain."

"What exactly happened?"

"I was watching Abel, while Jax and Crystal were off somewhere, so Half Sack, Abel, and I were at Jax's getting some things, when Cameron Hayes came in threatening to kill Abel with a knife, because he was saying that Gemma killed his son Edmond, but Half Sack tried to do something, but got stabbed in the stomach instead."

"Oh, no."

"I'm, still to this day, even though Abel's here and okay, I'm still pissed off at myself, that I did nothing to stop it... I was in shock, and Cameron took off with Abel." Tara glared at Nicole. "So don't sit there and tell me I wouldn't understand."

Nicole raised her eyebrow. "Whoa, Tara... when did you grow a set?"

Tara just rolled her eyes. "So anyway, tell me why you did this."

"Okay, If I do... don't we have that doctor-patient confidentiality shit?"

"Yes, Nicole." she nodded.

"All right." Nicole took a deep breath. "There's just too much overwelming shit going on, right now."

"Like?"

"Well, I'm so stoked to get out of prison, but I'm still trying to adjust, and having Happy and Kozik around me all the time isn't helping." Nicole paused. "Having Happy at the house for Riley... I don't know, because I'm having all these feelings for Kozik and I don't know how Happy would react."

"Maybe you should talk to them."

"I tried. I told them that nothing like that can happen again, but it's different with Kozik."

"Why?"

"Because... he's Riley's father."

Tara's eyes widened. "Are you serious?" Nicole nodded. "Well, I can definitely see it, now that you've said it."

"I've lied, to everyone, ever since I got out though."

"About what?"

"Who Riley's real father is, what happened to me while I was locked up." Nicole started to cry. "And all of it... is too much, because the same guy I said was Riley's father is the same person who was messing with me in the prison." she paused to take a deep breath. "He's gonna come after me."

"Who Nicole? Who is coming after you?"

"Kyle Hobart." she whispered.

Tara slowly looked up with her eyes wide. "You have to tell Jax and Tig, they're probably the reasons he's doing this to you."

"What?"

"Jax tricked him to go into the garage to see something, then the guys held him, while Tig burnt his Reaper off. After that, the guys just dropped him here at the hospital, on the sidewalk."

"Then maybe, he's getting pay back." Nicole nodded, wiping her face. "Look, I don't want the guys to find out, especially Tig, Jax, and Kozik... any of it and I know you and I haven't seen eye to eye, but I'm trusting you with this."

Tara sighed. "I won't say a word, but if Kyle does anything to you, Riley, or even Abel... I have no choice but to say something." she paused. "I still care about those two."

"Fair enough." Nicole nodded.

"From what Happy and Kozik has said, as you were getting admitted to the hospital... Riley is the one that found you, in your tub."

Nicole gasped. "Oh shit... how is she?"

"Right now, in shock, and she hasn't let Happy go." Tara finished putting the last piece of tape on Nicole's bandage. "So after I'm done here, I'm going to check on her."

Nicole groaned. "I feel like such an asshole... I didn't mean for her to see me like that, I wasn't thinking how it would effect her."

"I'm sure she'll be okay." Tara stood up, throwing away the trash. "As long as Happy's around."

"Right." Nicole nodded, then slammed back on the bed.

"Do you feel like seeing anyone?"

"Not really, but it don't matter, they'll come in here anyway."

"I'll just tell them that you're alseep."

"Can't you give me something to knock me out, so they can't wake me up?"

Tara frowned. "I'm not supposed to, but for you I will... I'll be right back." Nicole nodded, then a few minutes later, she came back in with a syringe. "Here is some medicine that will definitely knock you out for at least a few hours."

"Good... hook me up."

Tara chuckled as she injected the syringe into her IV, then tossed it in the trash. "I won't tell if you won't."

"Sure... doc." Nicole nodded, then five minutes later, she was already feeling it, waving her fingers around. "Is this supposed to be happening to me?"

"Yeah, it's the effects of the powerful drug."

Nicole laughed out loud. "Well, tell Mr. Kozik from Tacoma... I love him." Tara was just giggling. "I do, so tell him."

"Okay." Tara nodded. "Anything else?"

"What kinda name is that anyway?" Nicole laughed, then her eyes started getting droopy. "Tell Tig..."

"Tell Tig what?"

Nicole dozed off for a few seconds, then woke up. "Huh? Jax loves you Tara, what on Earth are you... talking about?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I know this, because I know this." Nicole put her finger to her nose. "Jus... email... my... Mom." then Nicole's eyes closed. "On the... prepay."

Tara just laughed, then covered up Nicole with the blanket, as she quickly passed out. "Get some rest, you'll need it." Tara whispered, then walked out of her room. She quickly composed herself before walking into the waiting room.


End file.
